The Problem Isn’t Between You and Me…

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in We=All Who Matter
Reading time: 1

…or you and them or us and them.

No.

The problem is always over there, on the table in front of us. And you and I and we and they are the ones to solve it.

 

In your corner,

Mike

PS: We can tell we’ve brought the problem between us because of the ensuing drama.

PPS: And yes, it only takes one of us to realize we’ve made this mistake and to change the focus back to the problem, over there, on the table, ready for us to solve it.

 

Today’s photo care of Pexels.

Suppose We Don’t

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Leading, Sales and Influence, We=All Who Matter
Reading time: 1

Suppose we cut corners? Suppose we feather our nests? Suppose we get while the getting is good? Suppose we compete on price? Suppose we sue? Suppose we press our advantage? Suppose we underpay? Suppose we over promise? Suppose we cut our training and development? Suppose we bait and switch? Suppose we baffle? Suppose we trick ’em? Suppose we get them with the fine print? Suppose we think, “Well, everybody else is doing it, why not us?”

People are smart. They will see. No matter how short-term appealing it might seem, if we proceed with something that isn’t a win for both them and us, it will always eventually be a lose for us all.

Let’s be the ones people choose over and over because we don’t suppose any of those things.

 

In your corner,

Mike

Today’s photo courtesy of geralt

Great Results

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Do=Natural flow of action, We=All Who Matter, What=Compelling Focus, Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 1

Great results occur when we finally see that our real work is to focus on what we want, feel good about what we want showing up even before it gets here [and not caring how it happens], engaging all who matter in win-win, and taking action based on our inspiration.

 

In your corner,

Mike

Today’s photo courtesy of gDiasasters

A Huge Payoff

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in We=All Who Matter
Reading time: 1

If I pressure you to cut your prices, then you won’t have the resources or motivation to deliver what I need.

If you push me to accept your opinions or directions, how likely am I to bring all of my mind and heart to helping you now and in the future?

If either of us backs down because the fight is too taxing, how many times can we accept the losses before we quit in exhaustion or frustration?

Though time blurs the connection, win-lose and lose-win always lead to lose-lose. So committing to win-win–that is, investing that bit of extra time to understand what makes a win for each other and to put our heads together to find winning solutions–has a rather huge, sustained payoff.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: 阿虎隊長 JAY_4668 via photopin (license)

Swim With  

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Leading, Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 2 min.

A man I met at a swim meet recently told me something enlightening. Whenever growing swimmers plateau in their performance–unable to go faster in race after race despite the effort–they are fighting the water. Their way of swimming pushes hard against the water and the water always wins.

Same for us.

As leaders who want to grow themselves and their organizations, we get stuck because we are pushing hard against the world and wearing ourselves out with all the effort. Trying to make things happen, trying to get people to do stuff, trying to create joy through outcomes rather than the other way around are how we fight against.

Swimmers get past their plateaus by working with the water not against it. They practice minor adjustments and watch their race times improve. We and our organizations get past frustrating blocks by practicing minor adjustments that have us working with not against.

We seek to understand others and invite them to play win-win. We create joy first and watch the outcomes follow. And we build a mental / emotional environment (essentially believing in others’ abilities and our success before the evidence appears) where great stuff happens with ease.

So much better, yes?

 

In your corner ,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: Helene Iracane 2e meeting Masters Henri Théolat, Poitiers via photopin (license)

We Have To Call Them On This Stuff

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Leading, We=All Who Matter
Reading time: 2 min.

Social conventions tell us not to say anything when we witness less-than-effective (or worse!) behaviors such as BS, bad-taste jokes, drama, or poor treatment of others.  We don’t want to add to the problem by kicking up a fuss.

But, good leader (with or without title), we have to call them on this stuff. It’s our job.

Happily, we can do it with a minimum of fuss. The most effective way is to name what we just saw. First, we affirm in our minds that it’s the behavior not the person we want to address. This will help them remain open instead of getting defensive. Next we quietly, calmly name what we saw. Examples: “I notice you haven’t answered the question yet,” or “What you just said was disrespectful,” or “You seem to be reacting strongly.”

Then we let there be silence.

They will either get it and correct things or put up a fight. If they get it, thank them. If they put up a fight and their points are valid, say so: “You bring up a good point. Let’s discuss that next (or offline later).” If they put up a fight and they are just being defensive, say so: “You seem to quite defensive,” or, “I notice you’re putting up a fight instead of addressing the issue I raised.”

It can be uncomfortable, at first, to call out these behaviors. We need to do it anyway.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: Ed Yourdon Football: Jets-v-Eagles, Sep 2009 – 29 via photopin (license)

Give Consequences or Explore Them

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Leading, Sales and Influence
Reading time: 1

We can give consequences so that people don’t screw up. “If you don’t complete this by Friday, we might as well kiss the Fortuna deal goodbye!” Or, “We really need to cut this check now or it’ll delay the project.” Threats like this can work in the short term. But they will damage trust and discourage future cooperation.

Or we can explore consequences together. “We know what Fortuna has asked for. How much can we deliver by Friday? What happens if we don’t? What else can we do?” It may take longer but we’ll build trust, encourage future cooperation, and probably arrive at better solutions.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: nik.golding Looking at me via photopin (license)

What To Do When You’re In The Quick-Fix Trap

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Strategy, Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 1

We can get trapped thinking we need a quick fix. Maybe we want a long-standing problem (e.g. not enough sales) to go away (e.g. by hiring someone to take over sales). Or perhaps we hope our problems will go away when someone discovers, picks, or rescues us.

But quick fixes rarely work. They miss what’s really going on.

Our desire for a quick fix masks our real needs: a bit of courage and a new habit or two to get us and our companies where we want to go. We don’t need to be rescued; we need the habit of winning while helping others to win. We don’t need someone take over sales; we need to have the whole company adopt a trustworthy sales process.

Quick fix? Think instead of the underlying habits we really need.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit:
Joe Loong
cc