We change when the benefits minus the pains of changing are greater than the benefits minus the pains of not changing. Not because someone said so. Not because we should.
We don’t change–even when we desire the change–because we are over-valuing the benefit of staying or the pain of changing.
To help ourselves and others make a desired change, we can draw out the benefits and pains of both options on a page. Then we can ask where we may be over-valuing. Or, more powerfully, “How we can look at it differently to tilt the balance towards change?”
In your corner,