How to Argue or Negotiate by Listening

In an argument or negotiation, we often resist hearing the other person’s point of view. We are too busy formulating our responses. And we fear that if we acknowledge their perspective, we will be giving in, agreeing, losing.

Nopitty nope.

By listening and even acknowledging that they have a good point, we are only saying that we hear them. Whether we agree is a separate thing. By showing them that we understand, we build the relationship, give them the great gift of being heard, and invite them to lower their defenses to hear our side.

We make a big mistake when we think listening is ever time consuming, threatening, or expensive. It’s the exact opposite. All forms of agreement first go through listening and understanding.


In your corner,



Today’s photo credit: Laura Ferreira cc


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