An argument or conflict is like a tug-of-war. To win, you have to pull, pull, pull. Someone wins and someone losses.
But what if we didn’t pull, pull, pull? What if we just dropped the rope? What if we chose not to battle?
Choosing not to battle–not to argue–is not the same as capitulating. While battling implies, “I am right and you are not,” capitulating means saying, “Oh, okay. Never mind. Let’s go with your idea.” Dropping the rope, on the other hand, means, “I am happy to engage as long as we commit to win-win. Let’s put our heads together and get creative. If we can’t do this now, let’s not play.”
Look closely and you will see we always have the power to drop the rope whether or not the others insist on continuing to pull, pull, pull.
In your corner,