You probably already know that “shoulding” yourself leads to resistance, wasted effort, and less-than-ideal results. And that paying attention to what you truly want is a shortcut to better results. Telling the difference, however, between something that you actually want to do and something that you think you should do can be quite tricky.
A great way to know is to see what feels good to you, physically, and what feels bad.
When you consider either option, do you feel–even subtly– tension, weight, numbness, or pain in your chest, gut, limbs, pelvis, neck, back, or elsewhere? That indicates that you are thinking about something that feels bad and is likely a “should.”
Or do you feel relief, release, lightness, tingling, or excitement in your body? That says you are considering something that feels good and is likely something you truly want.
Examples: Which feels better?
- Have that cookie or this carrot?
- Go out to dinner or stay in?
- Get your MBA or not?
- Go to the gym or keep working?
- Apologize or forget about it?
- Address that concern with your colleague/boss/employee or not?
Use this reliable internal GPS to guide you in these and other types of decisions.
To your continued success,
Mike
4 thoughts on “Does it feel like a “should”?”
Hey, Mike, brilliant! What an easy test – could we call this the “operational” way to sort through a task list?
I told Vivian about your daily newsletter, and we discussed some of the insights I had received from it. She would like to be added to your mailing list.
To your continuing success, amigo,
a luego,
Jay
Yup, it is an easy test. And I like it because it doesn’t negate our intellect. It rounds out our decision making.
Please have Vivian subscribe using the “Sign Up” button on this site. (www.balancecoaching.com). Or, email me (not as a reply to this blog comment) her address.
Mike
I love the “internal GPS” concept Mike! I’ll be using that one in the future.
Thanks for sharing.
My pleasure!
Ciao,
Mike