What Are You Saying?

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If you say that your endeavor won’t succeed, it won’t. If you say, “I hope it succeeds but really fear it won’t,” it won’t. If you say, “I would want this to succeed but I can’t see how it could,” it won’t.

On the other hand, you could say, “I am excited about this project. When I imagine it completed, it feels good. The next step is right there and it is simple,.” Saying those things, would you be more or less open to the opportunities that appear? Would you be more or less influential with the people who can help you help you?


So, what are you saying?


In your corner,



Today’s photo credit: alphadesigner via photopin cc



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Fundamentally, every single thought you have is creative. Both the positive, good-feeling ones and the negative, bad-feeling ones. Even the subconscious ones. Even the thought that none of this can be true creates your future. This is why the sages tell us to become masters of our thinking.

And mastery is not that difficult to achieve.


In your corner,



PS: Think about it.


Today’s photo credit: Wade Roush via photopin cc

mind your head

Why Wouldn’t You?

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What if every thought was a self-fulfilling prophecy? What if every notion, judgment, or idea you had would eventually become a reality?

If it was true but you were not aware of it, your life might appear sort of random. Positive, good-feeling thoughts about what you want and negative, yucky-feeling ones about what you don’t want would average out somewhere. Life might appear to hover generally around some set point of success and happiness.

If you became aware of it, you’d probably commit to moving your thoughts more and more towards the good-feeling side. And you’d soon notice that set-point of your life’s success and happiness rising.

Wouldn’t you?


In your corner,



PS: And if it was not true that every thought was a self-fulfilling prophecy, would there be any harm in believing it anyway?


Today’s photo credit mrdamcgowan cc


Posted Leave a commentPosted in Will=Our inner game
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In a typical week, I will hear people say things like

  • “My boss doesn’t focus on the right things.”
  • “My employee can’t work well with others.”
  • “The economy is struggling.”
  • “That’s just the way I am.”
  • “They aren’t working hard enough.”
  • “People don’t listen to reason.”
  • “My kid won’t focus on school work.”
  • “This company is doomed.”
  • “It’s hard to get new clients.”
  • “I am not good at follow-through.”
  • “This city will never have the infrastructure it needs.”
  • “There is no way that person is going to change his stripes.”

Judgments such as these focus on unwanted situations. In the last 7 days, how many times have you said or thought something like the above? If your answer is “more than once per day,” you probably are putting more friction and obstacles in your way than you need to.

As you judge things or people (including yourself), you help to prevent them from being anything else.

One solution is not to judge. That’s an okay response; it will stop the friction and obstacles. A better answer is to select judgments about what you like and want to see in yourself, others, and situations. Because, you see, those judgments will help to prevent you, others, and situations from being anything other than what you want them to be.


In your corner,


A Thought Game

Posted 2 CommentsPosted in Will=Our inner game
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Let’s play a thought game…

Pretend you make a wish that the craziness stops and everything in your work and personal lives is exactly as you want it to be. And, pop, your wish comes true. Wow! What would you do? Probably let out a huge sigh or whoop of delight, yes?

There would be no errands to run because you’d have everything you need. No meetings to go to, either; everything at work is running perfectly. No regrets to face. No worries about the future. You would be perfectly healthy, wealthy, and wise.

You then might try some “bucket list” things like skydiving or starring in your own reality TV series. Every day would be like a reverse “Groundhog Day.” You wake up to perfection and go on another adventure. Soon you would exhaust your bucket list. And faced with the prospect of unending perfection, boredom would set in.

Then what would you do?

On possibility is that you would play a new thought game. You would pretend that things were not perfect. You would make believe that your health, wealth, and happiness were somehow at risk. You’d then get to run around trying to make things better. After another sigh or whoop, you’d dive into this new crazy adventure of errands, work, meetings, conflict, pain, and achievement.

This cyclic thought game shakes things up a bit and helps us see possibilities in our real lives. Next time you are ready to curse the craziness or boredom, consider playing this game again. I think you’ll be surprised at how useful it is.


In your corner,


You are Not Your Thoughts or Emotions.

Posted Leave a commentPosted in Success, Will=Our inner game
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Tools like The Flip, The Ladder, and Tell Yourself a Different Lie help you “change your mind for better results.” When you shift habits of thought that no longer serve you, you succeed faster.

Yet often we avoid this introspection. We hold on to some habits of  thought, beliefs, emotions even if they have stopped working for us. Why? Because we think we are our thoughts and emotions.

Example: “I am a poor sports player” is a belief I’ve held onto for my whole life. Even though it’s just a thought, it’s sticky because the thought seems to be part of my identity. And I’m afraid of losing who I am–even wondering if I’d survive– if I were to give up believing it.

The good news is that releasing old thoughts or beliefs does NOT cause you to diminish or disappear. When you release an old thought or belief about yourself, you evolve. And you don’t need to release every belief or thought at once. Take it one thought or belief at a time and only as needed. And you’ll know it’s needed whenever you get tired of the struggle over it.

After you release a thought or belief, you get to fill the “empty space” with thought of your choosing (e.g. “I am good at sports.”).

So who would you like to be?

How to Build a New Habit

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“Our character is basically a composite of our habits. Because they are consistent, often unconcious patterns, they constantly, daily, express our character…” –Stephen R. Covey

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” – Aristotle

You’ve been there before, I’m sure; we all have.   You want to make some sort of change and can’t seem to make it stick.

Whether it’s your New Year’s Day resolutions, your promise to listen more, or your new time-management regime, replacing old habits with new ones is tough.  And it can be discouraging: how much energy do you have to start a new exercise program the day after you’ve declared the last program a flop?

Can you ever teach old dogs new tricks?

Why is it so difficult to break a habit and put a new, more constructive one in its place?

Two reasons:

  1. Habits, by design, resist change.  They are the original “set it and forget it” lifestyle aid.  And for good reason: habits keep you safe and sane.  You can appreciate how great it is that your habits resist change.  Without habits, you’d have to consciously think about everything.    Imagine what life would be like if you had to consciously think about everyday tasks such as walking, talking, driving a car, reading, typing, and remembering to say, “Please,” and “Thank You.”  All these habits made sense to you as you built them and they still serve a good purpose.
  2. The typical methods for changing habits have a fatal flaw: they try to fight the old habit with “will power.”  Will power is just no match for a nicely entrenched habit.  In his book, The Biology of Belief, Dr. Bruce Lipton says our habitual brain is more powerful than our conscious brain…more than a million times more powerful!   Your habits are going to win whenever you pick a fight with them.

Luckily, there is a method for building new habits that works. (more…)