monster

The Monsters are Fake

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Success
Reading time: 1 min.

Like the monsters under the bed, all the things we fear are fake.

Sure, we can stoke our fears into a roaring fire of yuck. And then we’ll (inconveniently) see all around us a reality that mirrors our fears.

But we can just as easily douse our fears by raising our buzz. Raising our buzz drives fear and its results away. It also gives us access the solutions that are invisible to us when we are in fear. With our buzz raised, we can look back, chuckle, and wonder what we were so worried about.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: mateoutah cc

steps

Three Ways to Sidestep Fear

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 1 min.

We fear the possibility of something negative happening more than the reality of something negative happening. If we notice ourselves fearing anything, we can

  1. Feel good (raise your buzz), then act instead of acting based on fears.
  2. Recall that we can handle anything that might happen, in the moment, should it happen.
  3. Ask ourselves, “Well, what is one constructive thing that I can do now?”

No need, by the way to conquer fear. Rather, let’s think of fear as merely a sign we have our attention on the wrong things. Then we can use one of the three above ideas to focus on the right things.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: P1050988 следы via photopin cc

terrierfied

Terrified

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Do=Natural flow of action, Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 1 min.

When we don’t say what needs to be said, when we don’t do the thing that is right to do, when we don’t make that big change, when we hold back, distract ourselves, or go numb, we do so because we are terrified. Terror holds us away from what we want and blinds us to the solutions we need.

Yet we need not be terrified.

If we are terrified, it only means that we are approaching something important that we’ve never done before. We fear failure in these cases but there is no real failure. We can handle any challenge, any situation. We can be vulnerable. Then we reap the rewards for dealing openly, honestly, and immediately with each challenge. Those rewards are new insights, better solutions, new or deeper connections with others, freedom, wisdom, and happiness.

 

In your corner,

Mike

PS: Yes, acknowledged: the first few times we try shifting from terrified to open can be difficult. That’s because terrified is a habit, a very strong habit. The first step is easy, though: we commit to changing it.

Today’s photo credit: ocean yamaha via photopin cc

stuck

The Sort of Leader Who Gets People Unstuck

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Leading, Sales and Influence
Reading time: 2 min.

People who don’t change can gum up our organizations and their careers. We try requesting, coaching, pleading, pushing, “carrotting and/or sticking,” or even jumping up and down. Yet people often remain stubbornly stuck.

We may explain their stuckedness as some character flaw. But they really stay stuck out of fear (or fudwar). And they are unable to navigate that fear. When this is true, all those things we have done to move them only trigger more and more defensive resistance.

Take heart, though; we can shift things. We start by quickly acknowledging (to ourselves only) that they have some fear and by recognizing how we have (had) similar fears, too.

Next we allow ourselves to be compassionate, setting aside any concerns that compassion leads to passivity or permissiveness (it doesn’t). We are quietly saying, “I get it and I know–perhaps better than you right now–that you have everything you need within you to move forward.” Then we redouble our work to foster a successful environment for everyone with compelling goals, effective systems, and clear thinking that feels good–all in service of win-win.

Being this sort of leader builds the required trust, unlocks fear, and helps people step out of stuck.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: Homini:) via photopin cc

future

Your Future Self Wants You to Know

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 1 min.

Your future self wants you to know

  • It will always work out, even when it looks like it is not working out.
  • As it works out, it may not take the form you are thinking it will.
  • What you fear is toothless. You can handle everything, whether you now judge it as good or bad.
  • If you mess something up, you will fix it.
  • Start sooner than you think you’re ready for. You are plenty powerful now. There is nothing to wait for.

 

In your corner,

Mike

PS: How do I know? Because this is exactly what everyone who has been successful says that they would like to say to their past selves.

 

Today’s photo credit: August Boehm via photopin cc

road out

The Road Out

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 2 min.

All of us want to move away from fear and toward joy. We are pre-wired for it. Our problem is that we unwittingly believe that staying in fear is the way to joy.

How did we get this way? We inherited it. We have inherited the habit of dwelling in the fear out of fear that something bad will happen. To move away from whatever threatens us (e.g. poor business results, change, politics, relationship issues), we tap the energy of fear to push us. We worry, react, and stress. We do this without even thinking about it.

Then we wonder why it’s taking so long to finally get to the joy (success, peace, love, abundance, results, health, calm) we’ve been seeking.

The road out of fear is not more fear. It is joy. We may be mostly out of or mostly in fear at any given time. We can always tell whether we heading out of fear because it feels good. Fear feels bad. To replace the old, inherited “fear itself” habit, pause, see how you feel, choose to focus on a thought that feels even just a tiny bit better (any thought that feels better will do), and repeat.

Go for joy.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: mendhak via photopin cc

parallel universes

Parallel Worlds

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 1 min.

What if there were parallel worlds? Science and science-fiction writers have explored the possibility. Occupying the same space as our own world, a parallel world could exist right next to us. We would never know it and could never reach it.

We can imagine that in one world, things happen and the people live in pain, force, struggle, isolation, ignorance, disappointment, and fear. In another world, mostly unseen to the first world, the same things happen. And the people in the second world live in calm, wonderment, play, love, growth, and freedom. In the first world, everything is hard. In the second world everything is a light.

How do you know that this is not exactly how our world works now? I think it does, actually.

Lucky for us, the world we want to live in is really only a thought away.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: NASA’s Marshall Space Flight Center via photopin cc

heart hand

Two Sides of the Same Coin

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 1 min.

The sages have always said that there are just two emotions: love and fear. It’s helpful to see that these are two sides of the same coin. Love is what you feel whenever you are allowing and appreciating what you want. Fear is what you feel whenever you are holding yourself away from what you want.

When you feel good, you are in love. When you feel bad, you are in fear; you are holding love away from you. Success and love are tightly related.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

PS: Yes, only these two.

PPS: What do you mean, “Yeah, but, how does this apply at work?”

PPPS: Yes, it’s always been in your hands.
Today’s photo credit: just.Luc via photopin cc

crutches

Hobbled

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Strategy
Reading time: 1 min.

We hobble our strategies with our fears. For fear of something we don’t even want to consider–we don’t even want to feel— we tie ourselves and our strategies in knots.

If your strategies are knotted, complex, and somehow not very compelling, then you may want to go back and unpack what you fear.

In your corner,

Mike

 

Today’s photo credit: j.edward ferguson via photopin cc

race

Race

Posted on 2 CommentsPosted in We=All Who Matter
Reading time: 1 min.

Sometimes we compete on price not value. Sometimes we attribute the basest of motivations to others and similarly justify our own slide. Sometimes, when we notice what others are doing, we withhold, we protect, we do the minimum, we go through the motions, we complain. Sometimes we race to the bottom where we all lose.

Such races are neither required nor inevitable. We race there out of habit and out of fear.

We can also race to the top where we all win. We can engage, give with no need for return, lean in, teach, lend a hand, and compete on value and love. We race here when we remember how great it feels, how very real problems melt away, and how all the benefits arise from simply participating.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

PS: Wanna race?

Today’s photo credit: w4nd3rl0st (InspiredinDesMoines) via photopin cc