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Statements and Questions

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in Leading
Reading time: 1 min.

Thinking we have to be strong–or at least to look strong or to look like we know something–we make statements. We make our case. We argue.

And we forget the power of good question. To see this phenomenon at its most dysfunctional, observe most any politician.

Leaders (whether we have that title or not) use both statements and questions. Statements are great for naming the elephant in the room and for reminding each other of our mission, our SweetSpot. Questions are great for deepening understanding, fostering trust, and creating win-win.

 

In your corner,

Mike

 

PS: Some really helpful questions include these: “What is true now?” “What do we want to be true in the future?” and “Why?”

 

Today’s photo credit: floeschie via photopin cc

Take Charge and Ask

Posted on Leave a commentPosted in We=All Who Matter, Will=Our inner game
Reading time: 2 min.

A friend wrote: “I would love to talk to [you] about specific problems I have, to lay it all out on the table and sit there and wait for [you] to tell me exactly what I should do. But this would be a cop out, wouldn’t it? It’s like an alcoholic waiting for someone to tell him how to break the habit, when we all know no habit can be broken without the individual concerned taking charge of his own life, moving on to new habits.”

Yes, it is up to you. It is up to each of us.

Of course you can ask for help as long as you stay in charge. Let’s say you are on a ladder, fixing something up above in your home. Your friend is at the toolbox. You say, “Hand me that wrench.” You are in charge and getting help. Next you say to your friend, “This bit is tricky. Do you have any suggestions?” Again, who is in charge?

“I want to get better at this. Help me plan. I notice that I am not as effective at that bit. Help me see what I am missing. Show me some tools and models that will help me think through this. Encourage me. Give me a sounding board for my work.” That is all fair play.

Go ahead. Take (or stay in) charge and ask for the help you need.

 

In your corner,

Mike