One way of navigating a problem is to say, “If only…” If only that person would change. If only this situation would be different. If only I hadn’t done that. If only I had a fairy godmother to handle this for me.
Another way is to say, “Yes. And.” Yes, that happened. And here’s what I choose to do now. Yes, that is an obstacle. And let’s put our heads together to find the best way around it. Yes, that was a mistake. And I am certain that you/I/we can do better (because we are better).
Accept and pivot. Throw in a good dose of kindness and caring. And watch how quickly you will progress.
In your corner,
PS: Whenever we feel hurt, threatened, challenged, rejected, disrespected, or criticized for more than a moment or two, we are likely taking the “If only…” approach.
PPS: Pro tip: Give yourself kindness and caring first. Then turn your now full heart to help any others who need it.